1. Consisting of members or elements of different kinds; of mixed character: a book of miscellaneous essays on American history.

2. Having various qualities, aspects, or subjects: a miscellaneous discussion.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

A Very Special Tea Party for Very Special Daughters

I have mentioned that I enjoy reading lots of baking, cooking and party planning blogs.  “Enjoy” is a rather mild term for me.  “Obsess over” is probably more accurate.  Many of these wonderful blogs have given me great recipes and have inspired me to try creative crafts.  I have “liked” several of these blogs on Facebook so that I get real-time updates and every day leads to more inspiration and more great blogs that I didn’t know existed.

Last night I read an entry from Kiss Me Kate (website to launch in a few weeks,) who I found through Amy Atlas Events.  KMK’s entry “…while we will be celebrating with a little tea party, we will also be remembering little Ava (Ava's Tea Party), sending her some fairy dust and sharing some little cupcakes in her memory xxx” intrigued me, so I clicked on the Ava’s Tea Party link.  I’m glad I did, and I’m NOT glad I did.

After reading Ava’s heart-wrenching story I went in the living room and hugged my precious daughter (and cried) and told her just how very much I love her.  I do that constantly now, but I just didn’t want to set her down from my lap.  I just wanted to hold her forever.

I know there are, sadly, hundreds of “heart-wrenching stories” involving children whose lives are stolen from them through illness, natural disasters, accidents and, most atrociously, through abuse.  I could make myself completely crazy if I think about all the little souls who didn’t get the chance to flourish.  A few weeks ago I read another blog about a woman who was the victim of domestic violence and leaves behind two beautiful little children.  I cried all day, and hugged Kyla extra close that day too.

(On a side note:  My husband Kevin has blogged for several years.  Our family has been the target of every nasty comment you can imagine and it is usually from someone who is brave enough to spew hate but cowardly enough to not use a real name.  I was disturbed to find that even on little Ava’s blog there was at least one vile comment regarding Ava’s mom’s parenting skills.  WHY must people be that way?)

In my opinion, Ava’s tragic story is not about neglect or bad parenting.  It can’t be put in the same category as the loser “mother” who wants to go tanning so she leaves her baby unattended in the car.  No parent is going to write about their family’s heartbreaking loss and set up memorials if they are neglectful.  It is not a way to assuage their guilt; it is a means of remembering a precious little girl who meant more than the world to her family.

So, after reading about little Ava,  please mark your calendar for Monday, August 22nd.   (For the moms who are a “9 to 5” in addition to being a “24/7” at home, celebrate this weekend instead.)  You can follow my lead by inviting your best friend and her daughter over for tea, or make the party as intimate as just you and your daughter(s).  You can make things as elaborate as you’d like by bringing out china OR as simple as using a cookie cutter on a PB&J sandwich and putting milk in a tea cup.  Just make sure you hold your little girl(s) extra close, and cherish every moment.

And by the way…  You don’t have to be the mom of a little girl to take part in this special tea party.  What daughter wouldn’t cherish a moment or two with her mom over a cup of tea?  She doesn’t have to be two, she can be 22!  A mom’s love for her daughter doesn’t stop just because she gets older and any mom will say her daughter will always be “her baby.”


Love & Sugar Kisses said...

Hi Jennifer! I checked out your blog and this is the first entry I read and was so touched by Ava's story. The 22nd is my daughter's 1st day of school and I think a tea party will be in order. Thank you so much for sharing and I will be sharing this as well!

Kyla's Mom said...

Thanks for checking out my blog but mostly thanks for helping to celebrate little Ava and your wonderful daughters.